The early morning hustle at the start of the new school year can be daunting for so many families. After so much flexibility over the summer, being thrust back into a strict morning routine (and bus schedule) can be chaos! Not only are you trying to get your kids ready to go, but you are also trying not to neglect yourself along the way. Have no fear; if you have faced the same panic, I am here to help you craft a morning routine you can implement to make the start of every day a joy rather than a dumpster fire.
But first, a caveat. Morning routines can change with the seasons, sports, activities, time changes, and weather, all of which play a role in what we prioritize. Also, the below is a guide; take what works for you and make it your own. Craft your ideal morning and remember to have some grace with yourself; it’s rarely perfect.
How to Craft a Morning Routine You Enjoy
1. Determine the Non-Negotiables
The first step to crafting a morning routine is to determine the non-negotiables –things that cannot be changed and are wholly inflexible. As a parent, this typically means the starting time for school and when you must leave to get them there on time. Alternatively, other non-negotiables may include taking the dog out for potty time, taking a particular medication, etc. I recommend writing your list of non-negotiables and the time they MUST take place.
2. List Your Core Tasks
Next, I recommend writing a list of core tasks that need to occur in the morning and how long they take to complete. Remember, it is not just about the kids’ tasks but your morning routine too! Here is an example of what it could look like:
Wake Up and Personal Hygiene Routine (Shower, Brush Teeth, etc.)
Estimated Time: 20 minutes-
Prepare Coffee/Tea for Yourself
Estimated Time: 5 minutes
Wake Up the Kids
Estimated Time: 10 minutes
Prepare Breakfast for the Family
Estimated Time: 20 minutes
Assist/Check Kids’ Morning Hygiene Routine
Estimated Time: 5 minutes
Get Dressed for the Day
Estimated Time: 10 minutes
Check/Assist with Kids' School Outfits
Estimated Time: 10 minutes
Pack Kids’ School Bags and Lunches
Estimated Time: 15 minutes
Quick House Tidy-Up (Dishes, Trash, etc.)
Estimated Time: 10 minutes
Family Time/Quick Chat
Estimated Time: 5 minutes
Final Check (Phone, Wallet, Keys, etc.)
Estimated Time: 5 minutes
Drop Off Teenagers at School or Bus Stop
Estimated Time: 20 minutes
I want to note here that these tasks will change throughout the years. You may have more tasks that take longer when your children are little compared to when they become teenagers. For example, I used to have to help my kids brush their teeth each morning and put pigtails in my daughter’s hair, which took about 10 minutes, but now I don’t even need to check that they did it.
3. Add Your Personal Touch
The core tasks listed above are the basics of a morning routine, but they don’t make it a good morning routine. To do that, you have to personalize it to your specific wants and needs. Of course, that is going to be different for everyone, but a few ideas could be:
Morning Exercise (Yoga, Jogging, Gym Workout, etc.)
A Leisurely Coffee/Tea with Your Spouse
Meditation or Mindfulness Practice
Read or Listen to a Podcast
Journaling or Gratitude Practice
Tidy a Specific Area of the House
Outdoor Time
Dinner Meal Prep
Skincare or Beauty Routine
I recommend choosing something that resonates with this season of your life and will benefit your physical, emotional, or mental health. Whether you add it in before the kids wake up or after they’ve been sent off for the day is up to you. Just remember, a good start to the morning can make an incredible impact on your life.
4. Work Backward to Create Your Schedule
Now that you have all of the components of your morning routine, it is time to work backward to craft your schedule.
First, you implement your non-negotiables and their times. For example, if your kid’s school starts at 8 am and you know it takes 20 minutes to get there, you would likely want to mark “heading out the door” by 7:30 so you have a little buffer and make that transition more palatable versus rushing out the door, yelling to hurry up and grab your shoes to put on in the car, and then dropping the kids off in a slow roll at the school drop off line
Next, add your core components and their time estimates. Back to our example: if we know we have to be out the door by 7:30 and it takes an hour to complete our core components, that means we have to wake up the kids no later than 6:30. I do, however, like to add a little wiggle room just in case, so let’s make that 6:15.
Now, it is time to personalize, which is entirely up to you. Some people like to wake up at 5 a.m. to address personalized tasks. Others want to jump into the morning routine and enjoy their personal tasks after the kids leave. No matter what works for you, mark your time into the schedule!
5. Implement and Adjust
Once your schedule is completed, print it out and put it on the fridge so everyone knows the plan - managing expectations is the key to a well-executed and calm morning routine. Once you have implemented it for about a week or so, you will likely notice that certain things need to be adjusted. Maybe a core task took longer than you thought it would, or perhaps it took half the time. Maybe you forgot to add something in and need to create space for it. It’s okay; adjust the schedule, reprint it, and go with it until you find the right rhythm.
Katie’s Morning Routine
As you know, my children are older, one in high school and one finishing middle school, so we have a fairly established morning routine, but it still needs tweaking as we head into the new school year.
I find that using the My Intentional Day sheet I crafted years ago still helps me determine what priorities I need to make space for. To give you some ideas on how I do it, here is what my morning routine looks like:
9 pm: Go to Bed Early
For me, a good morning routine starts off with a good night’s sleep!
7 am: Wake Up
By 7 am, both kids are already awake and showering. I pull myself out of bed, grab some athleisure, and go to the races. No mindful meditation, no slow rolling into the day, no morning exercise. It’s literally brushing my teeth, getting some casual clothes on my body, and getting to the kitchen - the hub of the household - to make a cup of coffee.
7 - 8 am: Middle Schooler Preparation
My middle school boy joins my husband and me in the kitchen at 7:20ish am. For about 10 minutes from 7:20-7:30 am we have a “family meeting” which is the time I dedicate to setting the kids up for success for the day. It’s changed over the years, and it’s shorter now, but this is what works for our family this season. First, it’s time to connect and ensure no loose ends. We sign permission slips, talk about the day and any after-school plans, try to say gratitude, fill water bottles, double-check the weather, and just connect. I find that this dedicated time is the secret sauce to a successful morning. When this gets skipped it’s hard to recover from the feeling of being rushed and reactive.
During this same 7:15ish - 7:30 am time frame in the kitchen my husband finishes the dishes (it really only takes a few minutes) and I wipe the kitchen counters, review my planner, tidy up if necessary, and sip my coffee.
At 7:30 am, we leave for middle school drop off. It’s a 5-minute drive, and I’m back home by 7:40 am.
8 - 8:15 am: High Schooler Preparation
By about this time, my high schooler is getting ready for school. She rolls into the kitchen at about 8:00 am to fill her water bottle and get her bag ready for school. We do the same morning meeting connection with her from 8:00-8:15 am. Then she’s out the door, driving herself to school. On days that she ice skates in the morning, she runs out the door at 7:20 am to get to the rink, and we skip the morning meeting.
8: 15 - 10am: Deep Work
By 8:15 am, the kids and my husband are out of the house. That’s when my personal morning routine starts. I jump right into deep work. My brain is most on fire in the morning, so I capitalize on the morning and work from about 8:15 to 10:00 am. Then, if I don’t have meetings, I get ready for the day and gather my thoughts, listen to a podcast, tidy my office space, review email and all the things the work-from-home day includes. If I have 10:00am meetings, I reduce my deep work by about 30 minutes and use that time to jump in the shower and get presentable for video meetings.
I am sharing my personal routine to highlight how important it is to find what works for you. Starting with deep work is unconventional, you may read other blogs and they will all say to start with the exercise, meditation, etc. I firmly believe when you do what works for you, the habits stick and your success multiplies. It’s all about timing and honestly, who really cares what time of day you exercise, think about gratitude or anything else. Do what works for you!
You Can Make a Difference in Your Day by Starting in the Morning
Remember, no matter how you go about crafting your morning routine, you have the power to make it a good start to your day!
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